DJ Phetmany

Thursday morning started with an early alarm and a desperate need for anything caffeinated.  While one might assume that in the land of SnakeBomb I might be able to get a good ole' cup of joe, think again.  Coffee as we know it does not exist.  That was until I found out about the Plain of Jars Cafe.

Picked up at 7:30 (I don't understand why we leave so early when the meeting is already set up and scheduled to start at 8:30), I literally threw myself in the backs seat of the truck and we went to pick up Lathtana.  When he got in the car, I seized my chance and practically begged him to let us find a coffee shop before heading to the hospital.  He happily obliged.  

Our first stop was the cafe, which wasn't scheduled to open until 9.  Who wants their first cup of coffee at 9?!?  The guy inside, busily watching a football game, told us that if we waited 10 minutes, he might be able to brew us a cup.  We said we would come back.  We got back in the car and changed our strategy: french press and ground coffee.  And yet, after driving through the Hmong and Lao markets, we were unsuccessful and 15 minutes later found ourselves at Plain o' Jars.  

Everything was going well and the machine was spurting out what smelled great.  As the barista was finishing my coffee I turned around to say something and in that split second all hope for a good morning was lost.  Almost a quarter of a can of sweetened condensed milk had been added to the cup and its sucrose thickness had ruined everything.  I wasn't going to be a diva, and we were now pressed for time, so I took the cup and got back into the car.

A couple sips was all I could muster before my morning became a wish-wash of caffeine/sugar/fake milk induced migraine.  Lets just say I was happy when the meeting ended and I could get back to the office.  While everyone else joined Bounsong for a celebratory luncheon and cracked open a couple BBL, I forcefully declined every drink and then retreated to the darkness of my room to work.  Although solitary, its actually a good and quiet workplace.  I give a whole new meaning to living at the office. 

The staff convinced Bounsong to stay the night and promised a great happy hour, complete with unlimited BBL, grilled meat and Carly's spaghetti.  When I emerged from my room, a grill had been purchased and the smoke from already charring pork was seeping throughout the office.  I waited for Viengmany and we rode over to the market so I could buy some vegetables for tomato sauce.  $1 later I had a bag of tomatoes, onions, garlic and carrots to spice up some tomato paste that I was weary of opening.  We were unable to find all of the ingredients at the market and Viengmany drove me to a real grocery store which was fabulous! I was able to purchase oatmeal and raisins (my new breakfast staple) and finish the pasta shopping list.  

We returned back to the office and the noise of several happy hour-ers watching the much await Lao v. Brunei football match.  I left them to their reveling and set to work in the kitchen.  I soon realized that no one had any interest in the pasta and I was simply cooking for myself.  Thank goodness because I really couldn't stomach any more fish sauce.  I chopped the onion and diced the tomato with the largest butcher knife I have ever seen before turning on a hot plate that was my one cooking implement.  In the end the sauce turned out great and I was able to wash it out and reuse it to boil water for pasta.  

Dinner success!

A welcome change from sticky rice!

I dished out a bowl and joined the wild crowd.  They quickly poured me a big glass of BeerLao on ice and made sure I got the last drops from the bottle.  Those are considered lucky and the drinker will be rewarded with a handsome boyfriend.   Oh Laos!

Having finally recovered from the morning coffee disaster, I slowly began to partake in the festivities.  It's not really like I had a choice in the matter however.  Beer is forced upon you and you are expected to drink it like water. Nevertheless, one thing led to another and we ended up deciding to have a raging dance party in the office.  I was sent to grab my computer and officially thrust into the role of DJ.

BBL in one hand and a shank bone in the other.  Just your average Happy Hour!

I hate playing DJ in the states, but here the stakes were low so I thought I would give it a go.  Breaking out some speakers we started with "Hotel California," which they have been begging me to play for a week.  They know all the words.  From there we payed respect to Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber, Avril, Cascada, Madonna and Rihanna.  It was rough but they loved it and danced all night long.  (Fear not, the playlist entitled "World Education Knows How To Party" has now been transferred on 3 USBs).

I ended up break dancing on the floor and have forever won the hearts of my Lao co-workers.  

Youla busting out some moves.  I laughed all night long!

"Significantly more sober than everyone else" Phetmany for the win!

We finally called it a night and promised to show up to work in the morning. Thirsty Thursday and BBL hangovers are not going to become part of the routine. 

Viengmany and Lathtana! We officially survived week one of shit.